Monday, November 8, 2010

Why can't we all just pee together?

It is time to post something about one of my least favorite issues which is who should have the right to use what toilet which is a transgender issue that manages to hit the wrong button in this woman who happened to be born transsexual. Let the controversy begin!!!

I am bothered by the continual attempts to blur the lines between what a cross-dresser/transvestite is and the transsexual condition. I wish neither condition on a single person but it is there and we need to deal with it. The problem is dealing with it and the misinformation that seems prevalent in society today. The spin machines are alive and well even in the unfortunate world many of us were born into with no say.

The only similarity between a cross-dresser and a transsexual is we may wear the same clothes but it ends there. I am no expert on whether cross-dressing is a fetish but it is not transsexualism. I am a woman and those transsexuals moving toward that goal identify as women and that is decidedly different from wanting to dress like one or emulate women.

I have no desire to hurt any transvestite or cross-dresser and what you do in your private life or at clubs or places accepting of you is your life and I wish you no harm but there is a limit and that limit is crossed when you want women to basically accept you as women even though your penis and balls are important to you and somehow women or transsexual women or women born transsexual must allow this because it is your right or perceived right to piss in my bathroom. It takes a pair of balls to believe that bullshit. You could simply go in the alley and lift your skirt and piss like you would if you were dressed as a man and no toilet was available but somehow the male ego of a man dressed as a woman wants to infringe on what little space we women have to ourselves.

I hate to clue all you boys in but we girls like to hit the ladies rooms en mass since most girls go with a girlfriend. Don't ask me why but it is something genetically ingrained in women.  We just hate to go to the ladies room alone. We also discuss important subjects in ladies rooms such as how cute that guy third from the end at the bar is and which one of us if single might try and make a move on him or maybe we are discussing what total assholes and total pigs some men can be or possibly how bad a lot of you are in bed or maybe that batteries and a dildo are better than some of you or maybe that we would prefer another woman because at least they don't want a blow job on the first date. The bathroom is our sanctuary and you want to take that away from us so you can play girl.

These same want-to-play-girl men are some of the men that deny women equal access to golf courses, board rooms, workplace promotions, and god knows what else. They enjoy the privileges of being men but want the joy of dressing as women in public and then expect me, if I know, to accept them in the stall next to me in the ladies toilets. What is next urinals so they can take a leak standing up in my toilet? Remember how pissed you were when the women at your golf club wanted  something you felt you are entitled to because you carry a penis and balls like the men only grill?

I am astonished that some men want to dress as women in public yet want to maintain their male persona and social privileges in business and life yet also want me to accept them as women in my toilet just because they dress like me and are faking being women. In my day they would be classified quite differently but this is a brave knew world where men-in-dresses have the balls to do it in public but want me to ignore the joy those balls give them and willingly let them use the ladies room. Interesting concept but I am not buying!

I do realize it is almost impossible at times to judge who is a transvestite and who is a preop transsexual but if you are a transvestite and you want to keep your penis and balls at least have the balls to use the boys room like you should or even an alley unless they are marked women or those pretending to be women for the evening.

If it bothers you to go into the boys room as a girl then maybe you should think twice about appearing in public dressed as a woman or stay in the clubs and places where it is acceptable behavior. Next thing you know transvestites will want to be allowed to come to work dressed as a woman one day and a man the next based on how girly they feel that day.

No wonder some transsexuals and some women born transsexual are paranoid about such things.


Sonora Sage said...

Don't ask me why but it is something genetically ingrained in women. We just hate to go to the ladies room alone.

Well, there we go then. I must be FtM. Would never have worked it out without this vital piece of knowledge. I have never, ever voluntarily gone to the ladies room with someone else, nor spent time in there discussing any of the subjects you mention. I go in, I pee, I ignore anyone else in there as I wash my hands, I leave.

Yup, must be a man after all. Guess I should start using the mens room.

(I will refrain on commenting on the rest of your post, for the sake of my blood pressure.)

Elizabeth said...


I guess your opinion is we must accept men in ladies rooms. I have never heard of someone being MTF and then FTM so that is a first.

Everyone is entitles to their opinion and if you are sad enough to pose the opinion that you must be a man if you like men in the ladies rooms then I will bow to your opinion of yourself.

If all toilets were unisex then so be it and maybe that is the way to go but if the toilet is marked woman I do not expect to find a man in a dress using it.

I do feel sorry for you if you have no really good girlfriends because it is generally how it works with my friends but maybe that is just my friends.

I do love men but I don't need them in my toilet. I this raises your blood pressure than you have more issues than wanting men in the ladies room.

Anne said... really DO know how to make this ol' girl laugh. I love it!

I really am amused by Sonora's comment, as well. I am thinking...(oooooh....I should really be careful doing that...thinking, you know...). Anyway, I DO think on occassion, and this concept of because..."I have never, ever voluntarily gone to the ladies room with someone else, nor spent time in there discussing any of the subjects you mention. I go in, I pee, I ignore anyone else in there as I wash my hands, I leave.", is Sonora' reality, or Sonora's way of doing things...THEN BY JIMMINY! EVERYBODY should do/think/feel HER way. This is such a typical example of FAR LEFT PROGRESSIVE,(or should I say OPPRESIVE), Hive-thinking, as to qualify as a CLASSIC.

But then, that is just me thinking...

and then.....I thought some more. And here is where it gets really dangerous. I thought, well HEY, I was in a large, (More than a dozen stalls), public ladies room alot this week-end. We, (my beloved hubby and I), were staying at a large hotel, enjoying a large social gathering. Because of our activities during the afternoon and evenings, I was in this restroom on more than one occassion. Every single time, except for once when it was totally empty, there were several woman in there, having animated conversations about such innocuouse things like shoes, guys, dresses, funny noises and how sweaty somebody was, while fixing their hair or make-up or changing their clothes.

Pretty exciting stuff.

Deena said...

Well since things have gone into the toilet I have to say that those automated flushing ones are really irritating and especially the ones that use some sort of high powered low water use mechanism. Some of them are set so that if you sit down and then make the mistake of leaning a bit forward they "blast fire" which is enough to make a person leap right off the seat. I wonder if its possible to put something on the sensor like a piece of tape to control when it flushes?

Anne said...

I HATE those things!

Elizabeth said...


It was an attempt at humor about a subject most women feel strongly about. Obviously to some of you it wasn't funny and statement about it being genetically ingrained was taken incorrectly since it was an attempt a shot across the bow of those wanting to legalize the use of our toilets by men in dresses and was not intended to imply that any of you that do not do it are somehow less in any way shape or manner.

Maybe I just traveled in different circles but most of that is tongue-in-cheek humor or bad humor to some of you over a touchy subject.

I could post a hate filled rant if you prefer.

I do value your comment and will attempt to work on my humor skills.

Anne said...

@ VĂ©ronique...

I am curious how you can relate to these men,..."who have 'transitioned' and live as women 24/7 but do not intend to get surgery" women?

Espejos said...
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Gin said...

@ Anne - "I am curious how you can relate to these men,..."who have 'transitioned' and live as women 24/7 but do not intend to get surgery" women?"

There are so many reasons why someone may chose (or have no choice) not to have GRS. But, for the sake of argument, let's say a there is a woman born with the transsexual condition desperately wants surgery but due to an uncontrollable factor, such as a medical condition, will never be able to go through with it. However, she does as much as she can to live as a woman. Are you going to deny her the best life she can have?

I know this is only but a hypothetical, but people cannot have GRS for a lot of reasons even though they may need it. A lot of them kill themselves because they become hopeless. Those that don't have to make do as they can and if they are living as women, they deserve to be treated accordingly.


Halle said...

It is only a funny subject if it really does not matter to you.

In Canada right now, revisions are being considered in the legislature to amend hate laws to include the transgendered. It seems the big argument going around is the one you have brought up.

As someone with huge decisions looming and a life in the balance, the issue of attempting to right a genetic wrong in the face of having to attempt to live 'full time' in a culture where I am expected to paint a bullseye on my chest and back at the same time, well it is a bit much. To have someone I have had some respect for make light of the situation stings, to say the least.

Sorry if I'm not laughing with you ladies.

Espejos said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Elizabeth, first I must apologize for deleting that comment. It was posted from the wrong account. I should have known I'd do that at some point! If you could delete it forever, thus removing it from view, I would be much obliged.

I will respond to the two follow-ups, but if those could go as well, I would also be much obliged. I'd ask you this in email, but you don't publish it (and neither do I).

And finally, this comment is temporary. ;-)

Anonymous said...

Elizabeth, I knew you were using humour in your post, but I didn't perceive that it was entirely humorous. I thought you were being somewhat tongue-in-cheek to make a serious point. My bad. I tend to take things at face value, and if you weren't making a serious point, sorry! I have to work on my humour-perception skills. :)

Yes, it is a touchy subject, isn't it.

@Anne: If they're friends, that's how I relate to them. I'm not having sex with them. It's kind of "don't ask, don't tell." I realize these are women that some would call "full-time cross-dressers." I don't see them that way, at least not if they're my friends.

Be that as it may, I don't really understand them either. But that's just me.

Anonymous said...

My request seems to have disappeared. Would you be so kind as to delete that previous comment from last night forever to put it out of sight? Sorry for messing up comments. I posted it from the wrong account. Should have known I'd do that at some point.

If you could do that I'd be much obliged. I'd be even more obliged if you deleted your and Anne's responses to that comment, but that's a lot to ask, I know.

And this comment is temporary. Please terminate with extreme prejudice! :)

Elizabeth said...


It was humor but it was not intended to make light of the subject. I intended it to be humorous but I believe it is a serious subject but I also believe only those born transsexual should have the right use a ladies toilet if they are MTF and transitioned.

I am kind of in disbelief that men with zero intent on being women want to use a toilet I may be in because they are wearing a dress.

This is an issue transsexuals face and I realize it is impossible to enforce but unless you are pre-op MTF transsexual you should not do this.

The other issue is this is a clear case of attempting to blur boundaries between transsexual and transgender that will in no way shape or form be of benefit to any transsexual. The reason many are upset about this subject is because if the term transgender is used and not transsexual then (a joke) Matt wearing Mary's dress has the right to use a ladies toilet whenever he throws on the dress.

If the term transgender is used in a law then I would like to see it include transsexual condition or something to prevent abuse. That is just an opinion and we all have them.

Elizabeth said...


First off the spam filter on this software occasionally marks the wrong one as spam. When I get back on I mark it as a comment and it will appear. The only ones I do not move to comment are the several actual spam messages I have gotten from seedy websites.

I understand how touchy this subject is and I do come down on the side on "NO WAY" but it is because I fear laws passed with good intent may in fact have less than good results.

There is a big difference between a transsexual (MTF) and a transvestite and the biggest is they are men who want to emulate women by dressing as one and then expect to be accepted with open loving arms in the ladies toilets because they sort of look like us. How very male of them.