Saturday, February 26, 2011

Transsexual Independence Day

Over on TS-Si they are looking for support for a day of independence for transsexuals. In typical Tranny fashion many of the self appointed Tranny leaders had to get into a pissing contest. The comment section rivals a Marx Brothers Comedy with poor Sharon and Lisa playing the comic foil played by the late great actress Margaret Dumont although the humor on TS-Si was more nastiness than anything else. It is actually typical to be honest; disagree and be put down and I mean nastily be put down, they are all professionals at it.

Immediately we had the factions fighting over whose idea it was and who thought of it first. Many of the self appointed Tranny leaders had their say.  Susan (Enough Nonsense) made a comment in support of Leigh who was in a pissing contest with Pamela. Susan needed to remind everyone that Leigh met her husband on a double date with Susan. Was that the double date at the Dallas Rob Halford Biker Bar?

Susan had to add she had seen the T-Shirt and newspaper clippings to prove Leigh had her GRS.  It does beg the question what Tranny would have a T-Shirt announcing surgery and who wrote the article? Does the T-shirt have “I Bought Me a Vagina” on it? Maybe it has an arrow pointing to the crotch area with “Bought me One” on the front and on the back says, “A New Vagina” just to let the world know. I guess those are bona fides to Tranny leaders. Maybe they examined each other as proof.

Of course Ms. Platine was required to show up and press her position that her petition was first, it was possibly, and then an argument broke out over whether Sharon and Lisa owed Leigh an apology for some slight with Leigh saying she apologized so why couldn't they.

Soon to be heard from will be Ashley Love and others claiming their Tranny group has been left out and some good old fashioned Tranny bickering will start. Every self-appointed Tranny want-to-be-important leader will be fighting to position their flock for the power struggle over who leads this Independence Day. I hope they have fireworks. It makes important Independence Days more fun. Maybe we could get the Boston Pops to have a Tranny Independence Day concert on the Esplanade in Boston. That is always wonderful and maybe John Fogerty will guest star.

In the old days, damn it was a long time ago, we Trannies in NYC would be arguing over who wore what to the “Tavern” or “54” when it opened. A girl needed a little pizzazz and style for the day. Everybody got along quite well.  The Queens and the crossdressers actually used the ladies rooms in the clubs but outside they kept a low profile cause they could be arrested which is partly the reason for Stonewall.  We had no issues with the GLB crowd because it was more of a live and let live time.  You do your thing and I’ll finally get to be the girl I should have been born as. I have never met a gay man or a lesbian that didn’t want the best for us. It is amazing how that has changed or has it really?

I really do recommend you read it because it is a clear indication of just how petty many of your self-appointed Tranny leaders really are.

Personally I believe they missed the boat on the name.

Transsexual Independence Day

Should be

Transsexual Independence Today

Transsexuals need to be free every single day and picking just one day seems so silly but it has an added advantage. You get this great acronym from Transsexual Independence Today or TIT for short. You will excuse me if I do not include myself in the group since many consider me a fraud or not a woman. My bona fides were forged I think or was it because I was really a gay boy or HSTS.  You will have to ask Susan, Leigh, ATG, and that crowd because it is confusing to us old timers. One should never infringe on the rights of the superior “true” transsexuals to be self righteous and pontificate.

Since many of the self appointed leaders are late transitioning women of history I would suggest nobody without a DD set of implants be allowed to march. TIT day requires some standards and no late transitioning self appointed leader of all transsexuals would have implants under DD since all women have big boobs. They will of course have special dispensation for friends who fail to qualify but then if they all wear the correct micro mini and tight fitting t-shirt they will get the point across. Of course all self proclaimed late transitioning feminists get a special dispensation and are allowed to wear appropriate non feminine attire. They are Tranny women of little history and proud of it.

How appropriate it feels. Think of the t-shirts they could wear marching on the appointed day of March 22, 2011. The sale of these T-shirts alone could be massive. I wish I had drawing skills but here is an example in writing.

The front of the t-shirt could have TIT in red on each breast with I Support with an arrow aimed at each breast above and of course I am a TIT Supporter on back.  The variations defy imagination and think of the money one could make selling these as the crowds gather in support of a TIT day.

Of course the added advantage of TIT is when the Transgender evil doers steal it for themselves and make it

Transgender Independence Today

They can have TIT wars between the TG and TS leadership which should be titillating. Imagine the glorious fight as each proudly claims TIT as there own and call the others TITless. Can’t you just see Sandeen chaining herself to a fence in Washington screaming TIT is mine and you can have it for seventeen million.  Oops, slipped into a Creedence song there.

For Sandeen the song would go something like this:

It Came Out Of the Sky

Oh, it came out of the sky, landed just a little south of Moline
Sandeen fell out of her tractor, couldn't b'lieve what she seen
Laid on the ground and shook, fearin' for her life
Then she ran all the way to town screamin' " TIT came out of the sky."
Well, a crowd gathered 'round and a scientist said it was Sandeen gas
Platine came and made a speech denouncing the TIT tax
The Vatican said, "Woe, the TIT has come"
Hollywood rushed out an epic TIT film
And Susan the Popular said it was a transgender plot

Oh, the newspapers came and made Sandeen a national hero
Susan and Leigh said they'd put her on a network TV show
The White House said, "Put the TIT in the Blue Room"
The Vatican said, "No, TIT belongs to Rome."
And Sandeen said, "TIT's mine and you can have it for seventeen million."

Oh, it came out of the sky, landed just a little south of Moline
Sandeen fell out of her tractor, couldn't b'lieve what she seen
Laid on the ground and shook, fearin' for her life
Then she ran all the way to town screamin' " TIT came out of the sky."

Susan (Enough Nonsense) could then add “I don’t care about TITs” to her I don’t care list if she loses the TIT war.

If the Tranny leadership wins the TIT war they could then arrange a TIT day of remembrance for all the TIT followers that injured their backs hauling those DDs around in minis and 5 inch heels.  That is tough work for your average 50-60+ year old “true” transsexual and self appointed Tranny leader. They might even invite a certain truck driver back cause DDs, tattoos, miniskirts, and 5 inch heels make the point they are transsexuals and they demand freedom! Somehow a Jerry Springer image comes to mind. Yikes!

The out trannies of course need the "stealthy" trannies to come out of hiding but if the "private" or "stealthy" old trannies come out they will immediately be rejected as elitists or frauds by the self appointed late transitioning leaders of all Transsexuals. It is kind of a catch-22 for those old time trannies. They will be denounced unless they bow to the obvious expertise of the late transitioning leaders who do have those 45-50 years as men needed to gain the experience to lead all the women that went before them and to redefine what a "true" transsexual constitutes which quite predictably fits them perfectly. One must guard against those nasty fraudulent transsexuals.

There will of course be a Tranny Guard legitimacy patrol that determines who has the right to march or write to their elected representatives. They could bring Aria back from the dead to lead the Tranny Guard. They could call themselves the TGs but sadly that acronym is lost to the enemy. Within the Tranny Patrol will be a pack of pit bulls handpicked by Aria to ensure “true” transsexual bloodlines. Sort of like an AKC registration for trannies run by true blue trannies. If they needed a rabid pit bull they could allow June Hingle to help. A muzzle will be required for safety though.

After the massive success of TIT they will need to push for a National TIT Day and March 22 is a good day since it is usually the first day of spring. Spring fits perfectly. The assembled masses can march down the Washington Mall from the Washington Monument to the Lincoln Memorial, hear songs from Bob Dylan and Joan Baez, and hear speeches by actor Charlton Heston, NAACP president Roy Wilkins, and future U.S. Representative from Georgia John Lewis. Oops; sorry about that; that was MLK and something with relevance.

Maybe they could find someone to give an MLK “I had a Dream Speech” for the TIT crowd. Gaining ones freedom from Transgender Tyranny is right up there with eliminating the stupidity of racism. I am sure Susan could write a brilliant speech that is punctuated perfectly telling of her multiyear fight for independence. It has been10 years hasn’t it?

Oops, just thought of something. With the “true” transsexual crowd leading the charge for TIT the crowds might not be so massive. Darn it.  They actually might have to “broaden” their definition of what a “true” transsexual is so a few “marginal” transsexuals join the parade. I just cannot see them diluting their self described “gene” pool with any of the “pre-homosexual” kids that somehow fooled the doctors into letting us become girls. Is ten a crowd or is it a gaggle or a more apt rafter (flock of turkeys)?

I am of course deliberately being sarcastic. I admit it. Why would I be so sarcastic about this? Sharon and Lisa are nice ladies and it might be a decent idea.  The problem is TIT is akin to throwing a single Tuna into a tank with twenty hungry white sharks. After the sharks eat the Tuna they will turn on each other in a feeding frenzy because they are cannibalistic when hungry. The question becomes who survives to lead? I am betting poor Sharon and Lisa feel kind of like the Tuna right now.

At face value it would seem to be a noble idea. It is if you believe others can define who you are and have the ability to imprison you in their belief system. It is if you believe the various power hungry self anointed leaders can work together and realize being transsexual is not some narrowly focused group defined by a group of delusional late transitioning “experts” that conveniently shove aside others like themselves that do not quite fit the delusional image they have of themselves.

Personally I think it is as big a pile of rubbish as the TG verses TS silliness plus the self appointed leaders are assholes on both sides.

Every person that travels this road has a personal goal. That goal might be surgery and being the best girl one could be.  That was mine. Someone else might want to be the best crossdresser they can. If it makes you happy then may you enjoy that happiness without some asshole telling you they are better or you are worse!

Don’t let some fool tell you that you’re a prisoner to some mythical tyranny that in most cases is a figment of their imagination. Don’t let some fool tell you that becoming a “real” woman is impossible because a “sex change technically changes nothing. It is not true because being a woman is as much between the ears as being a girl is. Don’t let some fool tell you that because you are a crossdresser you are subhuman and beneath contempt. It is who you are and it is your life.  Same goes for transvestites.

Don’t let some fool tell you there is a gay and lesbian conspiracy to hurt transsexuals. There is no such thing.  I mentioned it to a gay friend in NYC and he says “Wow that is news to me” and we got back to the topic of the moment.

When I reached my goal I think the old Negro Spiritual Free At Last  said it all.

"Free at last! Free at last! Thank God Almighty, I am free at last!"

It was a hard road to get there but my journey was over. I was 25 and I had the life I wanted and I learned to live. I had good times and bad times.  I had good relationships and bad relationships. The important thing was I got to be the real me that I should have been and had wanted to be for as long as I could remember. Nobody could take that from me. I lived every day. Some days I lived better than others but I lived every single day.

We cannot define others. We have the right to define ourselves and that is it. Reach your own personal goals and do yourself a favor and stay away from the “true” transsexual crowd.

They are rabid and they like to bite.

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Toilets and Power

This entire flap over who can use whose toilets is being thought of from the wrong angle in my opinion. It simply comes down to a little honesty on the part of all involved.  Honesty you say? Okay, I will admit there is not a lot of that in the so-called Trans community these days.  It is more like positioning themselves for the upcoming war by pissing on the appropriate tree hoping it will scare away the other Trans in the Trans community. Before anyone jumps down my throat one must realize that in the animal kingdom females spray trees also to mark territory.
Expecting honesty from most of power brokers in the Trans community is not happening. It simply does not matter whether the power broker is transsexual or transgender. Not one of them will tell you the truth about their true motives because as Lord Acton said:
"Power tends to corrupt, and absolute power corrupts absolutely. Great men are almost always bad men."
The English politician William Pitt, the Elder, the Earl of Chatham and Prime Minister from 1766 to 1778 is sometimes wrongly associated with this comment but his comment is also quite apt. He said:
"Unlimited power is apt to corrupt the minds of those who possess it"
It should be noted I do not agree with the comment that “Great men are almost always bad men” unless one means they are flawed as humans which most great men have been. This also includes great women.
Most leaders believe they are infallibly correct and are constantly trying to firm up their position of leadership and eventually get lost in the rhetoric of their own beliefs. Look at the local politician of the day and you will find the need to firm up their credentials as a “conservative” or a “liberal” here in the United States. The people in the middle are just fodder that the “self appointed” or even “elected” leaders abuse at their whim. A politician moves to the middle at the risk of offending their “base”. Of course what they always fail to mention is the base is composed of crazies on both sides.
Over on Pam's House Blend  Sandeen is on a rant about ENDA and the removal of the “bathroom” issue it. First I need to say something about ENDA and it is simple. If the ENDA supporters insist on use of the term transgender and not transsexual it is doomed to die an inglorious death as it should.  Any company that uses Transgender leaves itself open to the “gender expression” crowd and no business can be operated with employees “expressing” whatever gender they feel like on a specific day of the week. Multiple companies openly support transsexuals and are incredibly supportive and this movement is growing but it will be destroyed and stop if they must support the “gender” of the day crowd.  This is my opinion only and is based on 40+ years of working as a woman in the “real world” and unfortunately many think transgender implies transsexual and we all know it does not.
Only a fool would think a company would support a cross-dresser or a transvestite at work.  This said because someone is someone who occasionally expresses a different gender away from work is not a valid reason for termination and they should be protected from this form of discrimination but we all know this is not the aim of most in the Transgender leadership.  If it was they would have my support.
The issue about toilets is actually quite humorous. My first reaction is why would a man want to enter a woman’s toilet?  As a woman I have no interest in entering a male only toilet unless I am a masochist or selling services or the ladies room is closed and making it to the next ladies toilet is problematic. I have actually used the men’s room several times and simply said “sorry guys but ladies room is out and this outfit is too expensive for an accident” and universally they were welcoming and actually prevented other men from entering until I was finished. I admit I have the advantage of “blending” well as a woman but most men are gentleman about it.
First I need to admit it is not in my nature to confront someone in a ladies restroom based on gender or my assumption of their gender. I always assume they are transsexual and just trying to get through the nastiness that we all fought through with that condition. There is also the odd chance it is just some butt ugly genetic woman and any confrontation would be ugly so I guess everyone is safe from me since it is not in my nature to hurt someone without cause.
I need some clarification by those that are not transsexual on this issue because I am a little confused.
Is having the ability to use a ladies restroom part of the fantasy? 
If you do not want to be a woman then why is it so important to drop into the ladies room to perform your duties?
Why not use the men’s room and let them know you are one of them?
Is it fear of a physical confrontation that prevents you from using the men’s room?
I really have no issue with anyone expressing their gender and if they are willing to venture out into the “real world” and risk the embarrassment of being exposed as “men in a dress” then they certainly are courageous or maybe foolish or maybe just a little bit of an exhibitionist but as long as it is legal then go for it.
The problem I see is one of dishonesty. If you are men and enjoy staying men then why can’t you admit that to yourself and just use the men’s room en femme and let the chips fall where they will? Why do we women have to honor your need to complete the fantasy by opening our ladies room to you? I actually have an answer for this and it is simple. It is quite unequivocally because as men you think you control women and they will do what you want or you will force us to do it. Deny it all you want but it is the truth.
If someone came into a ladies room and someone else confronted them and they identified as a transsexual I would defend them.  If they identify as transgender they are on their own because I am unclear whether you are transsexual or just in gender expression mode.
What it really comes down to is that most horrible of all things involved in gender and that is “passing”.  Most of the gender expression crowd demanding the use of my toilets cannot “pass” and they expect us women to put up with their “expression” or in some sad cases their caricature of us. Sorry but that is just so freaking “male” it makes me want to puke.  Be honest and be a “real man” and wear your dress into the men’s room and tell them the ladies toilet is broken and maybe you will get the thrill of your life as they treat you like a woman. If not well you are a man.  Defend yourself like a man instead of pushing us around.

Monday, February 21, 2011

Have you ever wondered?

Have you ever wondered what affect we had on others as we went through this nightmare that is being born transsexual? Like most I am myopic in looking at this as my journey and my journey only to the young girl I should have been born.  We all get the same hate and non-understanding from those that wish we would either just go away or stop this stupidity. Have you ever wondered what those that you became close with actually thought of you when they first came in contact with the strangeness that was you?
 I have letters between my mom and Dr. Benjamin and those that I have translated are interesting, insightful, and sometimes even a little hurtful but my mother always loved me and as I have said not once did she ever say anything truly negative to me. It was not in her nature because I was her middle child and she was one heck of a mother as she sought a “cure” for her “sick” middle son and raised her other sons into wonderful adults.
A boy in High School broke down the wall I had built around myself to avoid trouble. I was not quite 13 when I began tutoring this boy in High School and I was not interested in friends. My life revolved around books, my belief I was a girl, and the knowledge I just could not live as a boy. I just could not do it and believe me it had nothing to do with being brave. It had one single purpose when I pushed back against “boy” just minimally. It was the only way I knew how to get through the next day without wishing I was dead and acting on it. Hopelessness is very difficult for a child. It leads to desperation and sometimes stupid and desperate acts.
When that handsome boy finally smashed down the wall I found a reason to live for the next day. He gave me something only my brother Ray had given me.  Kevin accepted me as a girl and there are people around today that would categorize this as a gay relationship but it never was. That boy had more courage than anyone I have ever known because he was known as my “boyfriend” for most of his senior year in High School and he never wavered. He literally saved my life once and anyone that knew me said they knew there was something between us because my eyes lit up whenever we were together.
His mother was one of the most important people in my life after my mom. She had been my mom’s best friend when they were in High School and she was the Head Nurse in the Emergency Room of the local Hospital which was the critical care unit for emergencies in our area of Massachusetts.  They received the worst cases and only forwarded the worst of the worst to Massachusetts General if necessary. I made it to Massachusetts General several times. For those not in the know Mass General has been considered one of the best hospitals in the world for a century and it truly is.
I live in North Carolina now and Kevin’s mom is nearby and we are very close. She was like my second mother back then and in many ways she made it possible for me to survive. I tell her she is one tough old bird and she really is. She is still active and our closeness has grown deeper in the last year. She kept a journal of what happened in her Emergency Room when she was on duty. She told me it was to keep sane. The Physicians and Nurses try and stay disassociated form the horrors they see but being human makes that almost impossible. Mary found that writing about some of what happened helped her “deal” with it.  I spent a lot of time in that Emergency Room from 8-14 and that included multiple suicide attempts, some nasty assaults by “confused” boys, several rape attempts, and a successful rape. It was quite gruesome in retrospect but seemed unfortunately normal to me.
I knew nothing of any journal until a few weeks ago.  Mary and I have talked a lot about back then because it means we talk about her son Kevin whom we both loved so deeply. I have no bad memories of Kevin except his death and that certainly was not of his doing.
I always wondered what Mary must have thought of me over that timeframe. She witnessed some of my desperate personal acts in the Emergency Room first hand and witnessed what others did to me but it was the trauma I caused her family that always bothered me because they were truly traumatized. Nobody deals with kids like us and comes away unaffected whether family or not. Mary offered to let me read relevant information. I was certainly a pain in her ass at times back then
Mary also told me she kept a journal or a diary about her family which is where the weird stuff comes in. I was a big part of that journal from late 1958 until Kevin’s death in Southeast Asia in May of 1963. In both journals I am initially recognized by my original boy name which is difficult for me because I so hated that name which might actually be stupid. My boy name had nothing to do with how screwed up I was or my being born transsexual. After all naming me “it” was not really an option when I entered the world. They had to choose something to name me since I was perceived normal.
She first saw me in an Emergency Room after a suicide attempt in 1954.  She was the Emergency Room Nurse that helped bring me back when I came close to succeeding at suicide when I was her son’s tutor. She struggled with the realization her son liked this very weird child as a friend and then more than a friend.
It was a time when I struggled to survive daily and she struggled to understand daily. Eventually I survived and she understood.  That understanding resulted in someone that cared enough to make my meeting with Benjamin possible. I do not know how to say thanks to Mary although I try. That she could go through all of this and worse an end up loving me like her own daughter baffles me. It also makes me realize there are people that do care or will care once they understand. I also learned that if given the chance many can learn to understand.
I do believe it helped immeasurably that I was so young and maybe being so young and na├»ve was a key.  It is kind of difficult not to feel empathy for a child.

Monday, February 14, 2011

Just who is morally Bankrupt here?

I have learned a lot of valuable lessons with this venture onto the internet. I was actually involved with certain aspects of the internet in the early years at CIT and then at UMB. Initially it was academic inspired and then it was research and development for a Company in Massachusetts working closely with MIT when I moved back to Massachusetts.
When you read of people implying they have been on the internet since its beginning they are talking about the explosion of usage directly related to the explosion in ownership of personal computers. This occurred in the early to mid 90’s and was interesting because for a lot of us our little private secret went public.
The ARPA/DARPA idea for a methodology to handle digital communications on the battlefield began as a Defense Department initiative with the help of several academic institutions and it led to your ability to read this post. So if someone says I was there at the beginning   realize to most the beginning was around 15 years ago when in reality it was actually 41 years ago.
I am amused when certain people criticize me for being “some 40 year postop that came out of nowhere” onto the internet and in their view this somehow correlates to being suspicious. Well I have never been an activist but I was a member of the first transsexual group on AOL back in the day when we used dial-up phones because hi-speed internet access was really just a dream basically everywhere. I was not very vocal but I listened.
I found most of the people in that forum to be slightly different than I imagined but and this is a big but nobody thought I was a fraud or gay, a transvestite, or a transgender activist attempting to subvert the rights of transsexuals. Were transgender people a threat then?
I never did spend a lot of time in the forum but it had the same loons then as we have now but they were a little more civilized. I left when the “it is a privilege to be born transsexual” crowd began to appear but I have been online every year since the public internet began.
I have been in different forums over the years and knew Lynn Conway back in the day when she had only been publically out for a short time and she tried to convince me to go public which I would never do. I have friends online that I communicated with for over 12 years through email and yes even in 3D a couple of times.
I could not keep up with what is now described as the “Community” because I was married to a great man and I traveled a lot because of business and in truth because it was getting ugly on the internet. The “you are an elitist” crowd began to show up and it immediately became apparent to me they wanted to remove most “old timers” from relevance. They thought the old timers had influence because they were there “in the beginning” and since power and control was the aim the old timers must go.
For those not familiar with the term “old timer” it began as a way to denigrate many of us that were involved in the nastiness of being born transsexual in the 40’s and 50’s and even the 30’s for a few. When one is after influence and power it is a negative influence if the professional activists think some “old timer” might have relevance.
The irony of this thought process is I know of few “old timers” that feel they are in any way better than anyone else. Most of us were just happy to survive and the vast majority left and blended into society as best they could and lived the life they had wanted. There were some that did not and even “back in the day” we had professional transsexuals so maybe those are the ones people are or were worried about.
I know it is politically incorrect to some but we were mainly heterosexual girls with the occasional lesbian girl that wanted a life away from being transsexual and I was not alone in wanting children. The fact I was able to raise my husband’s daughter from his first marriage is still the greatest joy of my life and being able to adopt her was priceless. I raised her for 14 years until he remarried and he took her from me.  There was really nothing I could do since he was the “blood” parent.  It is the reason I left California and moved back to Massachusetts.  I needed to be near my daughter.
I was under no obligation to pay a penny of child support for my daughter but why would I want to be out of her life? I knew if I fought him for custody there was that issue in the background but I had met his new wife and I actually liked her so we came to an accommodation. Like most good parents my love for her was unconditional and I knew my ex-husband felt the same way. In a rarity we decided to be civil parents and not end up in a fight over custody and life went on.
I have read with great interest the stories of many of my sisters that were married with children and just could not fight this transsexual crap any longer. There really is a point in every single transsexual’s life where it is just too much to deal with and you need to solve the problem. The one thing that has struck me and moved me is how devoted all of them have been to any children they helped bring into this world.
One can read the pain in their posts as they begin to deal with both a spouse and possibly children. I will probably never understand how they can marry and have children but many of the transsexuals Harry dealt with did and I am sure many of them will never understand what I went through as a child. It does not mean I would demean them or hurt them because they are different. In fact I have more respect for them because of how they put the welfare of their children ahead of themselves. It is what parents do even when they have brutally difficult decisions to make about their own personal issues.
I know a little about that problem but from a slightly different aspect. When my daughter was taken by her father I realized I needed to tell her about me. Don’t ask me why I felt that I did because I have no idea why. It was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life but she simply said “you will always be my mom” and in a way I expected it but I was relieved also. She knew I was not her birth mother but maybe the fact I was a doting mother paid some dividends.  We are as close if not closer today as we were then.
If there is one thing that really irritates women it is any parent that harms a child in any manner. I am not and never have been a proponent of the death penalty since it seems too arbitrary and racially biased as in too many minorities are executed verses non minorities. When it comes to harming children or killing children I have no moral issues.  I would pull the switch myself. You harm my child or any other child and so help me god I will get you somehow if I have a chance.
This leads to the actual point of this post. If a parent fails to pay child support deliberately it is a crime. If a parent crosses state lines to deliberately avoid paying child support it can be either a federal misdemeanor or a federal felony both of which result in automatic jail time. Either way the deadbeat goes to jail.
In order for a parent to be classified as a deadbeat parent and have their driving license suspended the time since last payment and amount owed must be egregious. In other words the deadbeat does not give a crap and has either disappeared locally or run to avoid paying child support.  In general it is the father that is the deadbeat but a mother may also be a deadbeat parent.
I have been accused by several people of being both chickenshit and morally bankrupt for disclosing these facts about Aria Blue. I have to agree with them in all honesty. I was a chickenshit and morally bankrupt for not reporting to the authorities what state she lives in so they can find her deadbeat worthless ass. I regret that.
So if I am a chickenshit and morally bankrupt for telling about a deadbeat parent and feel guilty for not reporting the deadbeat parent to the correct authorities what does that make those that have called me the above and worse? It cannot be denied because it is a fact.  If it was resolved all Aria had to do was say it was resolved rather than claim it was a smear campaign. It is still a very active case.
Most of these same assholes have accused me of being a transvestite, gay, a man, and a fraud yet I have stayed and fought because they are lying about me. If I was Aria and innocent as her supporters claim then I would have stayed and fought.  Well, I guess that would be true if they actually claimed she had not done this dirty deed but none of them actually have if you read closely.
If they knew about it before I disclosed it then they are pathetic worms. If they knew about it afterwards and decided to make me the issue they are hypocrites, chickenshit, and as morally bankrupt as Aria. If they have not bothered to ask Aria then they are just pathetic since the only question they need to ask was simple? Why would Aria run and hide if she was in the right?
I have no issue with people that make mistakes and own up to them and take responsibility for them and face the consequences like an adult. What makes it worse in my mind is Aria is attempting to claim the moral high ground despite the fact someone who knew what she was involved in called her on it. Poor Aria has been shamed for being a cretin.
I see what I did as something any woman would do. No woman will stay quiet when a deadbeat parent is discovered and there is no reason for anyone to stay quiet.  A child has been hurt.
The reaction of the “You broke the code of silence” club appears like a clear cut case of some ridiculous secret men’s club.  Well I do not belong to that club and never have and will never keep quiet when I find something like this. All of you should be ashamed of yourselves for supporting a deadbeat parent of any type. Why do I doubt any of you are ashamed?

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

I was; I won; and I am.

I have no illusions that I am some leading expert on being born transsexual and I do not want to be involved in deciding who is and isn’t transsexual. I really find the entire scene a pain in the ass. I do not believe any transsexual whether they are post GRS or before GRS has the right to tell any other person how to live their life.
I look at my life quite simply. I was; I won; and I am.
I was born transsexual; I transitioned and had surgery; and I have become the girl I thought I was and the woman I wanted to be over time. It is really and truly that simple.
Most people are just happy to get through this crap and come out the other side whole. They may comment on the internet but they have no desire to be professional anything and certainly not self proclaimed experts on who is and who is not transsexual and it does not matter the age of the transition and surgery if applicable. Having a decent life is all they want.
I understand how love can bind people together for a lifetime.
I realize a confused and hiding transsexual can marry; have children; and be so in love they stay together. I may never truly understand things like this because it was not me but I cannot deny people happiness by denying them
I realize it must be horrible to be married; have to leave your spouse to be you; and the pain one must feel leaving your children. I will never know that feeling because that was not me but I cannot deny people happiness by denying them.
I realize a transsexual can have surgery and can be gay if FTM and lesbian if MTF. Sexual preference is mutually exclusive with gender identity. I will never know that feeling because that is not me but I cannot deny them their happiness by denying them.
I realize transsexuals can be trapped and especially from my generation wait until they are in their 30s, 40s, 50s, and even 60s before they take action. Being transsexual is a complicated happening and is not something anyone in their sane mind chooses. I will never know that feeling because that was not me but I cannot deny them their happiness by denying them.
I realize an MTF transsexual can love a man before surgery and the pure joy of the acceptance one feels when a man loves you for the girl you are even if you were married as a man or dated women. I know parts of these feelings but not all of them but I cannot deny someone happiness by denying them.
I realize there are non-op transsexuals. I will never understand why one of them would run around screaming I have a penis if they want to be accepted as a woman. I know nothing of this because I was certainly never one.
I believe being transsexual is not simply a black and white issue. There are grey areas and I believe Benjamin had a better grasp on the differences than anyone ever but if somebody has a better answer I am open to understanding it but I am not open to total bullshit.
Unfortunately it is not that simple for a lot of people in this so called Trans community. There are some that believe it is their right to judge everyone and the pure irony of it is most of the people doing the judging fall into a rather unusual category and I find it very interesting and disturbing.
According to them I wasn’t, I didn’t, and I am not. According to them a lot of my readers fall into the:  you weren’t; you didn’t; and you never will be.
Quite conveniently they fall into their own special category. They were the only ones; are the only winners; and are the only women. How convenient.
It must be amazing to be that omnipotent.

Sunday, February 6, 2011

The truth about the Truth

A short time ago, in a blog not so far, far away...
It is a period of civil war. A rebel
blogger, striking from a not so hidden
blog, has won her first victory
against the evil bullshit empire.
During the battle, the rebel blogger managed
to obtain the secret truth to the Empire's
ultimate weapon, the Bullshit Spreader
, a
blogger with enough complete bullshit
to destroy an entire bullshit universe.
Pursued by the Empire's sinister agents,
this novice blogger raced home to her blog,
custodian of the truth about the Truth
that could save her people and restore
sanity to the blog world of bullshit....
Just a little silliness so excuse me for it. I never realized asking a question and telling someone they were a coward for banning open discourse could cause such a total shitstorm.  I was obviously quite wrong.
I was attacked immediately by a small group of confidants of Aria and it must be clear that I never once questioned her life or her narrative or whether she was who and what she says she was but they sure did about me. I gave back what I got and one is supposed to run and hide I gather. I do not back down from bullies any longer and unfortunately for Aria she found that out. Throwing mud is not a game I enjoy and I would have preferred it not happen because I feel people deserve to live their personal fantasy as long as they do not hurt others. Do not throw mud at me unless you want a mudslide back.
What Aria and her cabal attempted was nothing short of TS Profiling. They decide if you are TS or not based on their myopic view of transsexualism and their limited experiences as women after surgery if they have even had surgery.  They will use vile names to discredit you and claim you are a fraud and they of course have this TS bullshit detector and these special senses that know instantly about everything and this transgender detector and they alone are the judges. Most people run because it is quite offensive. I will not run so be forewarned.
First off I never “outed” Aria Blue and in fact I never intended to post anything because I realized Aria was so pathetic and so damaged that even a fool like her engendered some sympathy.  I posted this on December 15th and really hoped it was over but Aria took it as a sign of weakness. I stated categorically NOTHING would be posted.
On December 28th I was attacked by Aria in a comment where she attempted to claim I was someone named Arune and here is her comment and my comment that the gloves were off.
There is a complete chronological record of what went on between Aria Blue and the accusations I was gay, a transvestite, not a woman and this was perpetrated by Aria and her followers. I have a sharp tongue and responded.  Susan, of Enough Non-Sense, said it should not have bothered me but her life was not questioned.
Now over time Aria had positioned herself as the Purveyor of Truth about transsexuals and as the perfect true/classic transsexual and the only one that could determine who was and who was not transsexual and anyone that disagreed with Aria was a fraud including me. I foolishly posted some old stuff of mine that clearly proved I certainly knew Benjamin and Granato but on December 8, 2010 Susan of Enough Non-Sense basically attempted to bring that into question with some comments that sort of go hand in hand with the classic, “Have you stopped kicking your dog”, which is a no-win question for the person being questioned. Denial that you ever did such a horrible thing still leaves the initial hint you did or may have and I was upset but Susan insisted I was just mentioned “in passing” but we do have a decidedly different interpretation of the definition of “in passing”.
Aria made comments claiming you define yourself by “how you live your life” and claimed any indecision during transition or for surgery made some poor confused kid or even an adult a transvestite and thus a transgendered fraud or gay man or god knows what else her pee-brain could call them. Of course any friends received dispensation form Aria since they supported Aria.
When she pulled the crap in the above link I took some time to cool off and then on Thursday January 13, 2011 I posted my response and Aria Blue ran for cover. Aria Blue was a fraud and what was posted in no way outed her. Aria was a deadbeat dad or I am required to call her a deadbeat mother and was just as confused as many of those she crucified in the public bile producing forum that was her blog. She had learned her narrative like she accused others of doing and by setting herself up as this know-it-all asshole she lost her right to keep that part of her narrative secret. I fear I let that vicious piece of shit hurt others and should have exposed her earlier.
The irony lost on Aria and her followers is a simple truth. She made a mistake with her daughter and I do hope she rectified it. Her narrative is no better or worse than many transsexuals that have suffered and searched for answers under the pain of being born so different.  Rather than be a beacon of hope that you can beat this horror, despite mistakes, Aria chose to be a Purveyor of Hate disguised as the Truth behind her armored veneer as a warrior fighting the evil transgendered of the world. Aria chose hate over hope.  Aria chose intolerance over tolerance.  Aria became evil and even the good parts of her message became lost.
I do not want to be part of the transgender label but why am I supposed to hate them? Transsexuals are few among many and in the “real” world you need alliances to build a better world for yourself and others.  I may not understand cross dressers or transvestites or gender queer or whatever new fangled name they come up with but I was not raised to hate people and that includes the many that hurt me when I was young or have attempted to hurt me lately but it does not mean I will quietly go into the night. That is just not happening.
What little I posted was the truth and Aria knew it was the truth as did her friends because she seemed to go off the deep end mentally and I was worried about that but I should not have been.  You cannot keep a good rattlesnake down for long.
Now we get to the good parts.
There are interesting dynamics at work in the Aria world.  Aria wrote an email to Leigh Smith and I gather I am running a smear campaign against Aria. That is like the fox charging the Farmer with crimes against humanity for shooting his ass when he was caught with a dead chicken in his mouth and shotgun pellets in his ass. Sorry, the truth is not a smear campaign and besides since when has truth ever bothered Aria Blue? In the strictest terms I am damaging her reputation and good standing but that must be based on the truth of her reputation and good standing which was built on fraud. She earned her disrespect.
I defended myself against personal attacks that were the result of having the temerity to question her position on subjects and yes I said she was an Intellectual Coward which she has proven again and again but I never questioned her being transsexual like she and her cabal did mine. Leigh knows what went on because she witnessed it but when you are Leigh the truth is damned. Everything is clearly documented on my blog if anyone is interested.
There is a tidbit from Leigh about Liz having a lot of TG readers which assumes I actually bother to care who reads it and the implied thought that one should base friendships or readers on the hatred of an asshole like Aria Blue. A mention of CAMH which is supposed to hurt me and of course the crap about me threatening to “out” Aria and publish photos of Aria and just to be sure all parties understand this the photos I have did not come from June Hingle, Cassandra, or any of the parties you are speculating about and there are clear blog posts that state I had no intention of posting them and even after an Aria attempt to paint me as some individual I gather people dislike I did no such thing.
I guess you could ask the question is what I am doing to them any different than what they did to me? I can answer that easily. I am refuting someone and exposing them for hurting people deliberately with lies and innuendo and one of them was me. Let the truth run free and see where it falls. I am not afraid of it but they are.
Should someone that knows factually that a homophobic and hateful minister is himself gay and doing the nasty with a boyfriend feel guilty about exposing him? Of course not. Those who deal in hate need to be stopped. Okay, that is my minimal defense and just to be honest I cannot deny I enjoy watching them swing in the breeze as their own words and deeds hang them.

Saturday, February 5, 2011

A litle joke for all


'I've got problems. Every time I go to bed I think there's somebody under it.  I'm scared.  I think I'm going crazy.'

'Just put yourself in my hands for one year,' said the shrink. 'Come talk to me three times a week and we should be able to get rid of those fears..'

'How much do you charge?'

'Eighty dollars per visit,' replied the doctor.

'I'll sleep on it,' I said.

Six months later the doctor met me on the street.. 'Why didn't you come to see me about those fears you were having?' he asked.

'Well, Eighty bucks a visit three times a week for a year is an awful lot of money! A bartender cured me for $10. I was so happy to have saved all that money that I went and bought me a new pickup!'

'Is that so!' With a bit of an attitude he said, 'and how, may I ask, did a bartender cure you?'

'He told me to cut the legs off the bed! - Ain't nobody under there now!!!'