Harry had visited me in both Mass General and my local city Hospital. People were obviously worried about the traumatic post rape damage that might happen but the only memory I have of it was getting hit on the back of the head after he told me his wife, a friend, would like to see me. I have zero and I mean zero memory of anything that happened. In fact I have no memory of being taken to Mass General or even being there other than what I have read in letters between my mother and Harry and what Mary has written about that event which I have been unprepared to post here. Sometimes not knowing is not so bad.
When I heard the term tranny it was spoken with affection from one who once was transsexual to a still naive kid that was transsexual. I do not frequent porn sites but I gather the she-male crowd has so overused the term it is partially why it is out of favor. I also believe it has a lot to do with the transgender crowd and its complete attempt to destroy the usage of and the existence of those of us born transsexual. It is just my opinion but it was certainly they that have fought its usage. It is of little importance anyways.
The new term the transgender crowd loves is "trans". It goes along with there absurd belief that transgender is forever and that belief that the "transgender" need special protection because they are in fear for their lives and are discriminated against by both the public and all us "transsexual" elitists. Trans is their newest attempt at there ever compulsive need to make us all the same under one umbrella term. It is insidious and malicious but few seem aware of it.
If you look at T-Central you will see blog after blog using terms like "transman", "transwoman", "transphobia", etc. in order to pull everyone under the umbrella. They call themselves women when they put a dress on but transwoman when questioned because even they know it is a load of horse shit they are piling on because unless everyone is always considered trans then those that are truly transgender are about as sympathetic as an ax murderer or as logical as a screen door in a submarine.
The really funny thing is some of the ass-clowns spouting this rhetoric are classic. One is a 62 year old man that recently decided to con a therapist into putting him on hormones and suddenly he is a woman and those of us that were born transsexual spent $50,000 on surgeries and are no better than him in his dress because he cannot afford that surgery. This is the same man that has obsessed over womanless Beauty Pageants, cross-dressers and transvestites on the telly and everything related to being you typical transvestite. He openly stated he was a cross-dresser/transvestite but suddenly that has changed.
He is your typical male transvestite that late in life decides to "go all the way". Unfortunately for everyone he is a walking advert for the autogynephelia crowd and is now since transitioning a leading expert on all things "trans" including transsexuals, women born transsexual, the transgendered, and most important everything about being a woman. He is appalled we women would reject his access to our spaces because he is a woman like all of us or if you push him we women born transsexual are not really women.
He is of course one of those screaming about the Jenna Talackova Miss Universe story and his trans insistence on calling Jenna "transgendered" because everyone needs a special label in the "trans" community. He even tried to hold himself up as an icon or role model because all of us stealthy girls are such losers and so despicable since we are not "out and proud". Pretty easy to say that when you are a 62 year old man and have never lived as a woman other than going to a "special" bar en femme where men of course find his 62 year old self irresistible. His delusion is complete I guess.
He is a prime example of what transgender represents but he is not a role model for any 13 year old transsexual, or any 18 year old transsexual, and actually he is not an example for ANYONE that is transsexual but I do expect him to identify as transsexual soon because that is the standard mantra and narrative for all too many of them. He will suddenly have been a girl all his life and knew when he was 4 he should have been a girl and boys were attracted to him and so forth and on and on. He will of course be believed by all in the transgender community because that is the story they heard from those born transsexual and it really works well with the dumbshit therapists they see.
I decided to write this post to set a few things straight just to clarify things for men like this. He actually posted that those of us that have had SRS are "transsexual elitists" because we do not support his womanhood. He has the part about transsexual and elitists wrong but he is correct we do not support his womanhood.
I find it humorous but also infuriating when I realize so few people really know why we were considered transsexual. Transsex would have been a better choice but Harry started using transsexual after D. O. Cauldwell coined the term transexual with one "s" in 1949. There was a very specific reason the sexual part was added to trans to form transsexual and it has irritated the transgender and it is why they are out to destroy usage of transsexual.
It meant and still means across sex or more accurately going across to the other sex which infers changing the sex characteristics of the individual to match the sex they should be since all transsexuals thought they were either already the other sex, total psycho sexual inversion, or a were trapped in the body of the wrong sex. Thus came the phrase "changing sex", or "sex change", or "sex reassignment surgery". In my time we always seemed to use "sex change" but then we were just kids.
There is this misconception that Harry talked about gender identity but that is incorrect. Some believe John Money was behind the coinage of the terms "gender dysphoria" and "gender identity disorder" but it was actually first coined in papers written by Laub and Fisk in 1974. This event would eventually lead to the stealing of the anti-transsexual term transgender by some radicals in order to provide a more united front or an umbrella term without asking anyone but admittedly who could they ask since they were all out and proud militants and most women born transsexuals just got on with life as women.
There was also the misconception that Harry said many transsexuals are asexual. Harry did say that but his meaning has been lost on most. Harry was always talking about those of us born transsexual and fighting to survive and fix our birth defect and he did think it was a medical condition. Many pre-operative transsexuals were asexual for various reasons but primarily because we were the wrong sex. I would not be classified as asexual because I had a high interest in sex with boys but I did not have my first sexual experience until I was 25 1/2 and finally a girl. Many transsexuals were married or single and found it difficult to have sex with even their wives without some fantasy and the single ones just had no outlet so asexual was what it was.
Harry did not believe we were asexual after a sex change. In fact he was amazed how many that married as men had happy and consistent sex lives with their husbands and boyfriends and yes even girlfriends if lesbian. My first sexual experience is still one of those moments in life that is hard to put into words. Very few women born transsexual are asexual after SRS. According to Harry, late in his life we are pretty normal females in that respect.
The reason the transgender despise the word transsexual is because it clearly explains what a transsexual is as does transgender clearly explain what they are. We change sex permanently and they change genders when they feel like it. It was not long ago that sex and gender were considered different but that would not do and a concerted effort was made to force transsexuals under the "gender" banner. I changed sex a long time ago but in my everyday life I morph gender appearance depending upon where I was and what I am doing. If I was on my husband's family ranch in Texas I dressed like everyone which was like a male cowboy with curves as the ranch foreman called it. I have never been afraid to get dirty and was basically a tomboy there.
Being a tomboy is one of the few privileges we women get over men in public. We get to freely wear male style cloths but outside of the work or activity we are not trying to emulate men. The truth is simple. It is gender appearance that is fluid in women but not our gender. In most men gender appearance is rigid but in cross-dressers and transvestites it is far from rigid and the annoying part is these men do not realize they are caricatures of women and in so many ways plain insulting to women. I find it hilarious when transvestites and cross-dressers get their panties in a bunch when Saturday Night Live lampoons men in dresses or they get pissed off at RuPaul and his drag show on LOGO. At least RuPaul and his contestants admit they are men which is not something the transgendered will ever admit. They insist wearing a dress makes them women.
The transgender crowd wants "gender" to define what is male/masculine and female/feminine when gender really only defines what is masculine and feminine. They have been quite effective at this in all honesty and even have parents of young transsexual children using the term transgender. I often wonder how many would use transgender if they truly realized they were classify their child with those that have a fetish. We had some very interesting conversations with the parents of the two children currently being helped.
The interesting part is you will find these transvestite and cross-dresser leeches attaching themselves to these kids or the parents. If the parent has a blog they are active in the comment section. They never fail to get the point out how similar they are which is a fucking lie.
The word that really irritates me is "transphobia". If you disagree with the transvestites and cross-dressers you are transphobic. Well I have to admit to one thing, I am absolutely Transvestite-phobic and crossdresser-phobic. I have good reason since I unfortunately married one of them and was hurt by one of them and I know what sniveling little worms they are. They are manipulative and deceitful men whose only aim is their personal fetish.
There is one on T-Central that posts daily with photos every day yet claims he works multiple jobs to kept the family in food and in a home yet this man rents hotel rooms so he can go out en femme and at his size those outfits are not inexpensive. I gather he is going en femme to some conference and I pray if he is driving he obeys the speed limit because if that gets stopped for a ticket the poor police officer might suffer cardiac arrest looking in the window. It is particularly annoying reading how the "wife" doesn't know yet they manage to sneak out somewhere to dress. Sounds like a marriage that poor women bought into for sure.
If one has a strong stomach one can read the blogs on T-Central. It reads like a rogues gallery of sissy men playing girl while screaming prejudice because they are not accepted in society which is where all you still transsexual come in and those of us that have that history come in. They need to ride our backs to legitimacy but maybe, just maybe, people are beginning to understand.
There is a very simple truth about life. If born transsexual and you perceive yourself as a woman and work hard at being a good women along with appropriate medical intervention then society will accept you as a woman. If you insist on being known as a transwoman or permanently transgendered then society will see you as the man in a dress whether you like it or not. Sex is binary and you belong to one or the other and even the intersex get to choose. I doubt they choose neither. The transgender want the privilege of choosing gender for the day or basically either/or.
In the transgender world sex is not binary because gender and sex are the same so sex characteristics are not relevant and oh so very convenient for them. Women can have a penis and fuck other women. Men can have a vagina and get pregnant. It is just one big joyous "I am what I say I am world" and everyone should just get over it.
This need to be special actually comes from the alliances made with GLAAD and the original GLB. You would be surprised how few gays and lesbians believe in what they stand for or say. Funny how that works isn't it. The "out" activist that wants to permanently be known makes the decisions. Sounds familiar doesn't it?
5 comments:
Elizabeth,
Good post! I think I agree with nearly all of your thoughts in it. Which I know we've had very little over the past that we've had agreement with each other on.
I want to thank you for presenting something here specifically though. Something that when I read it I finally was able to see where I have been, where I am at, and where I will be eventually. It was this:
“..........Harry was always talking about those of us born transsexual and fighting to survive and fix our birth defect and he did think it was a medical condition. Many pre-operative transsexuals were asexual for various reasons but primarily because we were the wrong sex.”
And especially this part:
“...................... Many transsexuals were married or single and found it difficult to have sex with even their wives without some fantasy and the single ones just had no outlet so asexual was what it was.”
I can never express adequately the level of guilt I felt afterward. It always felt dishonest.
I'll have to trust his words to be accurate as to my future:
“Harry did not believe we were asexual after a sex change ................... Very few women born transsexual are asexual after SRS. According to Harry, late in his life we are pretty normal females in that respect.”
DJ
All social and political movements are very soon taken over by narcissists and attention-seekers; it's inevitable. I wouldn't be so quick to pin that on gays and lesbians, per se. I hear a boatload of complaints about the LGBT, from real life gay and lesbian folk. GLAAD annoys the hell out of them, too. "HRC" is commonly used as an expletive. No joke.
As for "Trans," watch out for the asterisk!
"Trans*" What's the asterisk about? It's what an umbrella looks like, viewed from the top. It's also what it looks like if you parked your identity under a telephone line and a rude bird came along... *splat*
But it's probably just another Transvestite Lobby obfuscation/conflation technique, taken from the digital world, where an asterisk is a "wildcard" that means "anything."
So I pick "transportation."
"Hi, I'm Charlene, I'm a trans* woman."
"Great! I need to get these boxes to Chicago by Friday. Can you do that?"
-- A.R.
its heartening to read more and more posts from transsexual women who are waking up to the damage being done by the TG label. i wonder how they managed to get the DSM-IV to drop the TS diagnosis and insert a TG one instead (that requires no desire for genital re-arrangement). Perhaps it IS fitting - Transgenderism is after all treatable with CBT and some frocks, so belongs in the psych ward.
transsexualism is treatable with hormones and surgery, so correctly belongs in the surgical department.
well, our voice, which is a really sensible and grounded one, is getting louder, and getting ehard. perhaps things will start to change.
every time i see a woman born transsexual called "TG" i make sure to write to the publication and let them know their mistake. if we all did it, i'm sure it would start to make an impact.
Good post.
I never really noticed the asterisk before.... but.... it does look more like a cat's rear end than an umbrella, don't you think? (grin).
The sexuality thing is interesting; I have far more apparent libido than before my SRS; it's definitely a "head thing". But then a woman's primary sex organ is between her ears rather than her legs (given that she is not repelled by her body parts), and her arousal is far more mental than purely physical. I noticed that even with all that testosterone swilling about years ago, so your statements and those of one of the responders about that ring very true with me. Post-op I am free to allow my body full freedom to respond to a sexual attraction.... it's nice.
I often come here and am always in agreement with the stated principles. So much so that I really have nothing to say which has not already been said, so I often make no comment.....And do you know what?...You have done it again.
I can't improve upon your narrative but it may be of some support to you that I can be counted to endorse your views. We are legion
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