It has really hit me lately that I do not understand what some people under the transgender banner want. I mean this honestly and I am not being judgemental or am certainly not trying to be judgemental.
It is pretty clear what those in the GLB and transsexual groups want and I am reasonably clear on that but what to transvestites, cross-dressers, and the gender variant want?
What to you want? Why do you want whatever it is? Why should it be that way?
Based on what I have read these are some things wanted or possibilities plus questions I am confused by. My opinion on whether it should happen will be after as a yes or no if appropriate but I am open to persuasion otherwise.
1. Do you want the right to dress in the gender of your choice at work whenever you like? No
2. Do you want the same protection transsexuals should have in the work place? No
3. Do yo want to live as women? yes
4. Do you want to be recognized as women en femme and as men otherwise? yes
5. Do you want duplicate driver licenses to cover the dress of the day? No
6. Do you want the right to use the ladies room when en femme? yes
7. Do you want society to recognize your social disorder as acceptable in a public way? Not sure.
8. Why do many insist transsexuals should be under transgender banner? No idea why.
9. Do you want protection at work so if someone finds out what you are you cannot be fired? yes
There are so many more questions. Help!!!!
12 comments:
Good luck on getting a straight answer.
I'm and androgynous person with autogynephilia. I have breasts and a penis. I may or may not have SRS at some point in the future.
I guess that makes me transgendered. Gender Variant too. What do I want? I guess I want the true transexuals or women born male to stop complaining.
You've passed through all the gatekeepers and checked off all the reguirements one by one. You are a woman now. Not transgendered, not transexual.... You've made it. You're there.
Enjoy!
Randy,
This response is not an answer Randy.
I am betting I get few answers from those not transsexual within the transgender community.
Transvestites and cross-dressers do not suffer from gender dysphoria. They have a social condition where socially they might prefer to present as female. Gender Variant is something I find confusing. Variant implies variable or diverse so having breasts and a penis vertainly qualifies as variant behavior but in my day they were she-males if not identifying as transsexual.
I am still looking for some answers.
But Elizabeth.... You're a transexual and Common Teri and I have agreed that we respect your wishes and you are no longer under the umbrella. You're a woman, not transgendered.
Randy,
At one time I was transsexual but as it is all the time the self identified transgendered never answer a question. Well, more appropriately they neve answer any I have. It is almost as frustrating as dealing with someone else that left. Answering a question or questions with commentary on my life does not helpt to enlighten me.
By the way what does Common teri have to do with this?
I reralize my questions might not be enlightening or something anyone wants to talk about but it would be nice if one transgender individual had the courage to answer one of the questions. Pick one I did not answer yes to if you want but this was not about me but what people like you want and if you want transsexuals to stop complaining about the transgnder umbrella, I am ambivalent by the way, maybe stating a position or answering even a silly question might help.
By the way I have never needed you or teri or anyone to agree if I am a woman. I passed through girl and made it to woman a vry long time ago and nobody and that includes certain transsexuals or certain transgender folk can take that away,
Now answer a question or don't respond.
Hi Liz.
I think that I understand your desire to get some clarity on just WHAT it is that the TG want.
Th problem I see however is in some of your answers to the qustions that you pose.
For example, you answer "NO" to question, 1 & 2. You DO NOT support the right of TG to dress "as desired at work", NOR should they enjoy the same protections as a "pre-op" TS in transition. FYI, I agree with you in this regard.
On the other hand, you DO support their "being recognized as women while dressed 'en femme', and to "live as women".
MY QUESTION is HOW can these two situations exist at the same time? How can one be "recognized as women and LIVE as women, BUT NOT be able to dress 'en femme' at work?
AND...if the TG DO NOT enjoy the "right to dress in the gender of your choice at work whenever you like"...WHY should they be able to use the ladies room, when/if 'en femme'?
1. Do you want the right to dress in the gender of your choice at work whenever you like?
Nope. Work is work. Your employer gets to make those decisions. He's the one that pays you.
2. Do you want the same protection transsexuals should have in the work place?
Nope. Transsexuals require different rights. Not being fired for something one does on their own time, off-the-clock, should not be a terminable offense, though. Known as the privacy of my own home* clause.
3. Do yo want to live as women?
Yes. Actually. But that's just me.
4. Do you want to be recognized as women en femme and as men otherwise?
Only to my friends. Why should I care what anyone else thinks?
5. Do you want duplicate driver licenses to cover the dress of the day?
Nope. That's a joke, right? I haven't even heard that one, but that's pretty ridiculous.
6. Do you want the right to use the ladies room when en femme?
Nope again. Granted presents some rather annoying time limits on my personal exposure outside of my own house, but it's called the ladies room for a reason. If you ain't got the equipment. Don't go in. If someone is living full-time as female and believes they are female, though, this changes the equation.
7. Do you want society to recognize your social disorder as acceptable in a public way?
I disagree with your assessment.
8. Why do many insist transsexuals should be under transgender banner?
I don't, and I really don't understand why either side is getting so upset. It's a word. Transgender does not equal transgender. We got it. Can we move on now?
9. Do you want protection at work so if someone finds out what you are you cannot be fired?
Yep. Please see *privacy of my own home* clause.
LOL Liz
I can't answer all of those questions. In regards to my personal life, I can pretty much say that I want to be treated like a genetic woman in the world. I don't need a lot of the things in the line of questioning. I don't need rights to crossdress at work. This all of course being that I am post-op. I know that I am or was a transexual but the rest of the world does not need to know that unless they are so close to me that I choose to tell them if I am super comfortable with them and that would not happen at my job.
As far as the TG community, some of the things that I see they want is just absurd and obviously about being shocking, pushing the envelope, and basically just wanting attention. Going to work on day as a dude and the next day as a "woman" is simply a cry for attention and any employer unless they own some sort of gay establishment understandably would not let that happen. Work is about the business not about you expressing yourself. You have every human right to dress however you want but you MUST be willing to accept the consequences of your actions. You can not FORCE the world to accept you. The more you try, the more you will be let down. Some people just don't know how to grow up.
Being placed under the TG umbrella is something that I have mixed emotions about. I certainly do not want to be confused with a crossdresser who is crying for attention. I do not want to be confused for an autogynophylic person who likes to be both. Fortunately I wont be because I don't run around town screaming that I was born a male, I am passable, and being viewed as a woman just happens for me. I am not trying to brag or make anyone feel uncomfortable. Being that I am a hairdresser and that it is a profession that is a tiny bit more accepting of girls like us, I have a bit of an advantage. Having said that, I feel very blessed to not have to deal with some of the challenges that both TS and TG girls have to go through, but the things that we TS girls want seem to be different and for different reasons.
Lastly, I do not feel like I have a disorder anymore therefore I do not need to have that disorder accepted. Some people are offended by the word "disorder" but what else do you call having the brain of a female and the body (or body part) of a male which is in fact what I feel is the issue in my case. I fixed my problem but even though my body matches my brain now, I still relate to and consider myself to be transsexual because no matter what I have done to fix my problem, I still had to fix it nonetheless.
I am just going to live. If I run into problems I will deal with them then and there. If someone finds out about me, and they have an issue, it doesn't matter if there is a law that says that they have to respect me because I don't want to be around ignorant bigots anyway.
@Anne
Just trying to get some TV to respond. Point taken.
@Anonymous
Thanks for being honest.
@Elizabeth
You are a girl sweetie. Transsexual will always be part of our past abut it is not what defines you now. Getting Petunia plenty of exercise is more important. :-)
LOL @ Liz
Petunia is getting lots of exercise these days. She is blossoming into quite a flower LOL.
Elizabeth, there are more of us out here than a lot of people realize that have tried to ask these questions. We are usually met with vicious attacks.
Try to get Autumn Sandeen to make a single statement of who she is talking about when she uses the term transgender when discussing laws. She refuses to answer. I want to know! Just like you want to know. I am an activist and if the TG folks won't talk to us how the hell are we going to include them in on anything we do?
I dont really know what being transgender means but I am not a transexual as you are, that is for certain so I will have a stab at the questions.
1). definete no although hopefully dress codes are becoming obsolete in this day and age
2)I am not sure what protections transexuals want so I cant comment
3). I already live full time as a woman.
4). Yes
5). No and that is ridiculous. I am very happy with my new drivers license which reflects who I am now.
6) Yes
7) Not sure really. I do want to be treated with good manners and for people to be polite.
8). I think you have this one backwards. Transgender people would mostly rather be considered as transexual but that is silly even to them and so they add to their legitmacy by including transexuals as their own. Just IMO.
9). Yes, but I live in Ontario Canada and that protection already exists here.
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